Although the LondonMeUp.Com World Cup special remains absent (if you’ve read this week’s article you’ll understand) from the hallowed digital world, I’m sure you’ll nod in agreement when I start to talk about the unavoidable nature of football based talk. This week’s My 2 Pints, along with The Old Explorer, is no exception. With its pin-point central location, just off both Oxford St and Regent St, the landlord would have to be a fool not to show the games (or French), especially those featuring England. I visited the place just at the right time to see what it’s like during both game time, and when the most exciting thing on the screens is muted tennis.

So what’s it like? Well let’s start off with when I got there, 2 hours before kick off. Even though it’s lunchtime, it’s empty enough for me to nab a table and get the drinks in. The first thing I notice, is the Wetherspoons style ‘Double Up for a pound’ advertisements behind the bar. ‘Not a bad deal’ I ponder, but I do not want a double of any kind. It’s summer, it’s ain’t half hot, and I want a cider. 5 minutes later (after a queue of one for the bar), and I’m back at my table clutching a pair of glasses, a pair of cider bottles, and little else (90p change from a £10 note). I think to myself, looking around at the character-less furniture, harsh lighting, and promotional advertising based wallpaper as I do so. ‘So... It’s almost exactly like Wetherspoons, only twice the price.’ So what’s the appeal?

Another 3 drinks, and a further 4 hours or so later, I can tell you. Not a lot. The location is pretty handy, and it must see quite a lot of passing traffic. It’s perhaps the second closest pub to Oxford Circus station, so if you don’t know of the Argyll Arms, or you simply don’t like the charming little sectioned off rooms they’ve gone for in there, you’d be happy to find it. You might be slightly less happy if you were told you could have been in The Cock around the corner, and enjoyed the best from the Sam Smith’s brewery for less than £2 a pint, but ignorance is bliss, and you’re sat down with a cool pint in your hand so who gives a toss? That’s a fair point, when The Old Explorer does (to be fair) tick all the simple boxes.

I’m not sure how they did it, but almost every table was taken up, and yet there was only one dude behind the bar (with a manager coming to help him out once in a while), but no evidence of a queue. The music was a mix of inspirational England football songs, and 80’s power ballads (about winning and being the best). The food, along with the booze, was on the pricey side of a £5 note, with a club sandwich splitting a tenner, along with the difference between snack and meal.

High prices + central location + the interior design of a Travelodge: The equation adds up to travelling businessmen, tourists, and tired people, all of whom just need to make do. It tells in the atmosphere, you can feel it as it whizzes past you, sucked from every orifice.

10 minutes before the start of the game I look around me, and there’s suddenly not enough room for a cat to swing its mandatory patriotic flag. The atmosphere suddenly stands up, and starts to chant amusing, and a little bit lewd remarks. England score! And Akin gets a high five from a stranger! How many times does anyone get a high five from a stranger!? The final whistle blows, everyone jumps ship within 3 seconds, and only the travelling businessmen, tourists, and tired shoppers alike remain. Lesson: World Cup generated atmosphere can not be trusted. It’ll be gone in a few weeks, then where will you be? In The Old Explorer, crying into your pint along with every other fucker, that’s where!

BEER SELECTION: As good as it gets. All regions of lager, ales, bitters, four ciders! 4! Plus cheap double mixers. ****

COST OF A ROUND: Despite the double mixer promotion, £15 a round of 3 is not good in anyone’s book. **

STAFF: Thanks to the impending football, I fear we were blessed with more than enough options. ***

FOOD: Just about OK. Chips a bit sweaty looking, salad a bit pathetic. Not even nearly worth the money. *

SKIRT RATIO: Office types, mum tourists on their way to a West End show. Unless England win, don’t try any lines. *

Overall: You might find it difficult to find a pub near Oxford Circus, especially if you’ve been on your feet all day, or your office is just down the road, but please try harder, you’ll thank me when you do. **

The Old Explorer - Oxford Circus - Brought to you by James Wormald -