Events
The Original Walkabout - Brought to you by James Wormald -
The LeedsMeUp.com veterans will know only too well the advantages of getting pissed at home before you go out. Having often not even bothered going out, just staying in and watching TV (Brookside Challenge). However it’s also advantageous because once out, you’re drunk for most of the night, not as much time is wasted at the bar getting drunk. This is why in Walkabout last Wednesday, even Gazz came to watch the football before hand. In attendance at the start of the night were Gazz, The Infamous Youd, James’s Bro, And James himself (me). The usual plan was in place. Escape the house as soon as Punks is in her room. Unfortunately she caught us, and invited herself. With the enthusiasm of the night ripped right out of us, we trudged to the venue praying for some kind of large truck to bless us. Perhaps a large truck with spikes on? The night slowly kicked into gear and by slowly I’m referring to the acceleration of a Morris Minor. Drink after drink, member after member after veteran. Each joining with overjoyed smiles, soon turning into oversized tears. Joining the party were Newbie JB, Veteran M, Leg.End Aaron and non-member Sarah. Quite a mix. Early on in the night M and James’s Bro left in search of better things (Cockpit) I don’t know what the hell they thought they’d find. We’re all probably partly to blame after running away to play ‘The Total Film Quiz’, leaving him alone with Punks for a full 30 minutes. Surely no man can take that kind of torture, not even a Worm! As I said, the advantages of drinking early are plentiful, especially if the bar’s packed. This is why it took me 20 minutes to get a drink. I’d like to bless all the Walkabout bar staff for the tremendous job they do each and every day, especially on a day when 7, count them 7, of the normal bar staff fuck off to Barcelona! During this wasted time, I missed a lot, so I’m sure lots of people tried to kill Punks. Just to assure you, we did try, I’m sure of it.
When I’d finished at the bar, and Youd had downed his ‘Turd Ferguson’ (That’s right, downed!)
The drink that is a combination of Guinness, Cider, and Rum, Punks wanted to leave. Unfortunately she had no keys as M had left with mine. (That’s still my story) M hadn’t gone home, but I didn’t tell Punks that, why the fuck would I? I wanted her to leave! After she’d fucked off everyone had a much better time. I really fucked off a barmaid by cleaning a section of the bar for her, not sure why she was so angry actually. I think I made up for it by giving her about £10 in tips.
Anyone who attends Walkabout will be familiar with the great number of girls dancing on tables. It was then I caught Jordan staring at a couple, I told him to go and ask if he could dance in between them. Jordan being Jordan was pessimistic, probably thought he wouldn’t fit his massive head in there. But he got it through the door didn’t he? Eventually. Anything can happen. The girls turned out to be surprisingly willing to dance, after I’d bought them both a few ‘Cheeky Munjcakes’ obviously (Slags!) This didn’t last long, as soon as I left for the toilet, Youd and Gazz managed to lose them, not before getting a picture up one of their skirts of course. I believe the drunken ‘Waaaayyyyyy!’ is customary. Crestfallen from our biblical defeat, we stumbled home, giggling all the way. I was caught on the floor 4 times, But I didn’t fall over! Once I was just resting, once Gazz pushed me, once Youd humped me into the ground, and once I just jumped into the bush because I felt like it. Whilst running home however, I did run full speed into, and resulted in wrapping my soon to be swollen bollocks around a post.
A classic Leeds Me Up evening!
Extra: Brought to you by Gazz Wood -
James is right, while at the bar he did miss one or two choice moments. Hello, my name is Gazz and I'm here to guide you through the parts of the night TheWorm didn't see.
There was of course the pint glass balancing act of Aaron and his lady wife, the continually snubbing of Punks and the one on one between Punks and Sarah. Punks wanted to sit down after coming back from the bar, Sarah was sat where Punks wanted to be and so Punks, social as ever, just told her to move. Something I should probably mention is that Sarah is hard, so doesn't take kindly to be told what to do by anyone, especially some Timmy Mallet lipped teenager, so Sarah refused to move. What followed was some excellent back and forth, with Sarah trying to get Punks to say PLEASE and Punks saying everything but please to try and get Sarah to move. Followed by Punks pacing up and down the back of the bench to find somewhere to squeeze in and the two of them having little digs at each other without the other one noticing. It was fucking ace. After that I spent several years at the bar myself, soaking up God knows what drinks with my elbows. The only other thing of note I would like to point out is that Youd kissed the blonde that Jordan had danced with. See Jordan danced with two first year girls called Stella and Katie (the blonde one). Youd was swarthy as ever and just got stuck in. Bish bash bosh. That's pretty 007 if you ask me.