Events

Sheen Unit: Whitby - Brought to you by Bird’s-Eye -

Over the past few weeks, I’ve come to realise that I hadn’t had a complete day off to myself.  Every day has been spent either working or at Uni.  Some days, I’ve been forced to do both.  So you can imagine my delight when I realise that Friday 14th October was officially, a Nate-Dog day of rest.


So, what to do?


Sat around on the Thursday with seemingly knob all in sight, made me crave a day out.  So it was decided – we’d go to the coast, for a grand Sheen Unit day out.


For the record, it was Sherlock’s turn to be wank, as both he and the Tits would not be joining us on this road trip.  Instead, Mr Sheen, Hubba Bubba and Windsor were the passengers.


We all clambered into the trusty vehicle and quickly read through the AA Route Planner’s golden directions.  Fairly straightforward: Head for York, via the A64.  From past experience, I seemed to recall a sign for ‘York A64’ a few hundred yards out of town.  So we dead-headed for that and all was well…


 Until all signs for York ran out. 


Gone.


That’s Leeds sign department for you (or so my driving instructor always used to say).


The directions told us to take a left.  There was no left.  Left didn’t exist.


So we ended up back in Dewsbury.


So Mr Sheen and myself took Hubba Bubba and Windsor on a tour of our stomping ground: first stop, my house.  Windsor was fascinated at the dozens of foreign artefacts, spouting ‘wow, look at that!’ ‘oh, wow – a picture on the wall – how quirky!’.  The next stop was Mr Sheen's family gaff, at which Windsor was equally excited: ‘Oh wow, so this is where the Youd’s live’ ‘I have to find Mrs. Sheen’.


After picking up a road map and some revised directions, we were on our way.  And from here, all went well.  Nothing beats a good old road trip, especially to the music of Kanye West and the musings of the Radio 1 crew.

 

We arrived at about 2:00pm and parked up, braving the brisk ocean air.  We dropped into Trenchers restaurant for quite literally, the best fish and chips I’ve eaten in a long time, finished off with a spot of tea.


Grand!


From here, it was off and away – for a walk along the pier and the revelation that Gem hates it ‘when you can see the sea between the wooden boards on the pier’ and feels as though people will plunge into the depths below if they stand on the railings.


We discovered that Windsor, believe it or not, has a big head.  And a massive neck!  Wow!


And, on a personal level, I discovered that those steps at the end of the pier that lead onto the lower deck, are meant to be descended backwards and not forwards (as I’ve done for the past 10 years, almost killing myself on each trip to Whitby Bay).  You learn something every day.


Then, it was on to the Amusements.  No trip to the coast is complete without a spot of Time Crisis 3, those 2p machines and the fruit machines that seem to steal your 20 pence each time without actually giving you any time to press any buttons.


Then we went for a walk up the hundreds of steps that lead to a number of old, church-like buildings on the top.  You can look over the hill, down at the twinkling lights of Whitby Bay and it’s all very nice.


Then, it was to the pub, for a pint of Whitby Ale and a sit in somewhere warm.  By now, our hands had gone blue and our noses a strange pink and yellow colour, so the consumption of beer was well-embraced.


The rest of the day was spent strolling around.  It was lovely to get a day to myself and to spend some time in the fresh air.  We had more of a laugh on our way back down the amusements, where we continued to shoot more bad guys on Time Crisis and stand in awe at the twinkling red lights.


We had coffee in The Pier pub and extracted even more piss from Windsor, who continually repeated “I’m sorry, what?”  “I’m sorry, what?” until we finally started taking the piss out of him for saying that, too.


He’ll never win.  The poor bastard.  (and the shirt was pink, Windsor, despite any excuse.)


After a small argument as to who was going to ride shotgun (Mr Sheen called it on the first journey, meaning Hubba Bubba wanted shotgun on the return), Hubba Bubba finally won and quickly realised that navigation is harder than it looks, especially in the pitch black, backward, inbred countryside that is the Whitby surroundings and….Pickering.  Just let’s say, you wouldn’t want to break down in Gotheland.


Within twenty minutes, the Mr Sheen and Windsor were fast on.


And we were back in Leeds, 1 hour and 28 minutes later.


It was a good trip –we’ll have to do it again sometime.