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Leg.Ends: Oli the Cunt - Brought to you by James Wormald -
The Leg.Ends series continues with one of the most outspoken members of V.1.
‘Oli The Cunt’ was a huge Cunt. And that, so the legend goes, was why we loved him. It must have been true, that’s still why we love him.
It was always something, whatever cuntish quality Oli was displaying, it never mattered to us.
Whether he was stealing money, bringing home random girls and ‘I’m sure he couldn’t have been, not Oli’ sleeping with them, bringing home groups of crap 14 year old Goths to sit with his flatmates until their bus came at 6 in the morning, then fucking off to take some drugs. Or whether he was just crushing my chest in the front door.
Whatever he was doing, he was always being a cunt about it, a nice cunt.
It’s regular acts like these, dispersed with aberrant (for him) kindness that made Oli the Leg.End he is today. It’s true (I know it’s hard, but believe me) that Oli once invited a tramp to sleep inside our gate, gave him a duvet and a cup of tea! I’ve no idea what brought it on. Especially with the on-going war between us and the tramps. To his credit, the guy did leave the duvet and the cup on the step the next morning.
What’s perhaps even more unbelievable, is that he didn’t piss on the gate before leaving!
To Oli! As much of a Leg.End as that tramp!