Articles
The Anonymity of Travel - Brought to you by James Wormald -
I say ‘travel’ but I mean mainly plane, and sometimes train. For I’m talking of the situations many of us will find ourselves at various points in our life. Some of us will be dealt with these situations more often than others due to their way of life, but almost every person will have at some point experienced this, and know exactly what I’m saying.
I say plane and train because no other forms of transport really have the ability to be so anonymous. Unless hitchhiking, you know at least one person on a car journey. Therefore can get introduced to others easily. Bus rides are rarely long enough for the need, or the awkwardness of which I’m about to discuss to settle in. Even with the train, it only applies to long distances, and even then only a certain type of person will feel it necessary. So I’m going to concentrate on the plane journey, because the rule applies for a journey as little as 1hr, whereas with all other forms of transport, even for journeys up to 5 hrs, it may not apply at all.
Seating plans in most modern aeroplanes today mean the majority of passengers are sat in a line of three. If the three passengers in these three seats are all friends and all know each other, then obviously they’re gonna talk, get along, no problem. But only if they came in a group of three. (Or number divisible by three) If there are 5 friends, then 2 inevitably have to sit in another line of three, which means 1 has to sit next to a stranger (as long as the flight is full enough). It’s the same with 4 friends, 1 has to sit next to a stranger, possibly (and probably) 2 strangers who know each other.
As soon as all three parties take their seats, they know exactly what situation they’re in. When on a train you can sit down next to a stranger, but not know exactly how long you’ll have to endure their company, they could be getting off at any stop. But when flying, each party knows how long you’re both gonna be there.
Seriously, I’m not saying you’re gonna meet a friend for life on an Trans-Atlantic flight, but you’re stuck together for that amount of time, you might as well make the most of it right? The awkwardness of the situation is what throws you into it. It doesn’t apply for any other situation. You wont offer a Campino to a guy in the hairdressers. However when flying, to not say something to the person next to you will slowly eat at you, like not being able to go to the toilet. Eventually the pressure gets too much, instead of a warm stream flowing down your leg, similarly embarrassingly, you uncontrollably shout out ‘Hello!’
It’s always just ‘small talk’, which no one really likes, but everyone does. Where you from, what have you been doing in…, what do you do, that kind of thing. This is a big, BIG problem for me. I HATE small talk. But take heart from the fact that it doesn’t always have to be like this. If you, like me, flat out refuse to engage in meaningless talk about shit, then don’t. On the recent flight back from Rome I was sat next to a couple of lovely English girls. How do I know they were English? Because of they’re accents, not because of where they were from. I have no idea what they were doing in Rome, or what they do, and I didn’t give a munj.
However like I say, the flight couldn’t be filled with an awkward silence, the pressure would have proved too much for me. What happened then? How did I manage to avoid silent anonymity, as well as meaningless small talk? By discussing the finer points of Whist.
Take heart from the fact that it is possible, don’t fear flying, and when flying, don’t do it if you don’t enjoy it.
P.S. Aces are high.